The One

Uhhh. GLEE Live 2011 in the first row (in the PIT!!!) was A…. wait for it… MAZING!!! AMAZING! I’m super deaf now (hearing is slowly coming back), but so worth it. Here are some pics. I’ll post more on FB & Picasa soon. It’s hard to take good pics when they’re moving around so much.

Act 13:

“It’s never too late… To Find A Soulmate

To have a soulmate you must be one. It’s usually a natural selection. Soulmates find each other. But you must be receptive. It’s beautiful, rewarding friendship. It has a strong spiritual element. It can’t be manufactured or forced. To find yours you must look outwards, not inwards.” – Patrick Lindsay

Quote in book: “A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” ~ Aristotle

The age old question… Is there one person, one soulmate, out there for each of us? Do you believe in “The One”? My answer: I think “The One” is a ridiculous concept (I’ll explain in a sec). That is not to say that I don’t believe in soulmates. I just think you can have more than one. In fact, I don’t think the idea of soulmates is limited to romantic love. Soulmates can span to your Bestie or BFF or just a really good friend.

Dictionary.com says a soulmate is “a person with whom one has a strong affinity." Merriam-Webster Says "1. A person who is a person who is perfectly suited to another in temperament" 2. A person who strongly resembles another in attitude and beliefs" Wikipedia defines Soulmate as this “A soulmate ( or soul mate) is a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity, similarity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, or compatibility.”

It can be one or all of those things, which is why I feel the term soulmate extends to more than just your sexual partner. The most important part is it’s a person that you have a strong or deep affinity to. Someone you connect w/ on a level different from others. Sometimes at the same or even deeper level than family (depending on how close you are to your family). A connection so deep that some people only feel it w/ one other person. Hence, the idea of “The One”.

So, why don’t I believe in “The One”? Logically, it just doesn’t make sense to me and it’s mainly two reasons: 1) Death and 2) Proximity. Let’s take death. I’ve got two situations.

A) Falling in love at an early age (say grade school). You know he/she is “the one”. However, before either of you turns 18, he/she is tragically killed by a drunk driver 10 days before his/her 18th birthday. – If he/she is “The One”, then what? You never find anyone to spend the rest of your life w/? You are doomed to be alone because your “The One” was killed? If he/she wasn’t “The One” for you and you do find “The One” later in life. Who was “The One” for the person that died? Did their partner lose out because of death?

B) After being married for 20 years and your partner dies of cancer. You are lucky enough to move on with your life and find another widow. You fall in love and get married and spend 20 years with another person. Who was “The One” of your life? The person who died of cancer or the person you just spent the last 20 years w/?

Now proximity: It’s really hard for me to believe that there’s only ONE person for each of us. From a probability standpoint that’s like 1 in almost 7 billion. This person just so happens to live in the same country, same state, same general area as you AND just so happens to be looking for love at the same time. Come on… The odds are not good in this situation. It’s a wonder how ANYONE finds their “The One”. Some people call it “Fate”. I call it “non-sense” or a “ridiculous concept”.

Again, it’s not to say I don’t believe in fate. I do. Things do happen in your life for a reason and fate sometimes brings two people together to affect change in each other’s lives. Sometimes it’s a positive change and sometimes it’s a negative one. It’s how we deal w/ that change in our lives that makes it positive or negative.

So, if I don’t believe in “The One”, what do I believe in? I believe we all have numerous people (soulmates) we are compatible with. Meaning we don’t have “the one” we have “the many”. This helps me deal w/ both of my issues. The proximity/probability thing makes more sense and/or goes away and well death does not leave us in a lurch. Don’t forget that just because you’re soulmates doesn’t mean you can live/have a life w/ each other. What happens if you fundamentally disagree on the way to live your lives… examples: whether to have kids or not, where to live (burbs, city or rural), Food preferences (vegan vs carnivore), how to raise your kids (if you decide to have them), religion… Just because you disagree, doesn’t make them any less a soulmate, it’s just not someone you’d want to share your life w/ in that way. Hence, I have a couple of friends I consider soulmates, but 1. We don’t share a romantic love and 2. Sometimes we don’t agree on how to live our lives, but we still love each other and will support each other till the day we die. So, enough of my preaching. I think you get my point.

So, go out there. Find another soulmate. Or tell the soulmate(s) in your life how much they mean to you. For the one that I know that reads these… Wanga. You are my girl. I will love you forever and you are like a sister to me. Thanks for always being there for me. I don’t know what I would do w/out you.